To write or not to write (not really a question)

Day twelve of NaNoWriMo and I’m proud to announce I’m three hundred and fifty five whole words ahead of schedule, having managed a short but intense stint of writing over the past hour and a half. It’s funny how sometimes the words flow like honey and other times they stick like mud. I can’t say I’m doing the best job of sticking to the story skeleton, or that in recent chapters I haven’t strayed somewhat off the writing piste where my chapter plan is concerned, but right now none of that matters – because right now those glorious words are tumbling out one after the other, like parachutists leaping from an aeroplane.

In recent days my inner critic’s been leaping around in my mind like Jack Nicholson in The Shining, brandishing its creativity-severing axe and wailing like a banshee. At times it’s been so hard to drown it out that I’ve been tempted to succumb, not just to this writing challenge but to the challenge of writing altogether. I’ve compared myself to others – the kiss of death for any aspiring author – and concluded my writing doesn’t make the grade. I’ve even questioned just how much I want to be a writer – if it’s worth the sacrifices and the pain I know I need to endure to get to where I want to be.

But then I’ve realised (as I always do) that it doesn’t matter if I’m not as good a writer as other people. It doesn’t really even matter if I ‘make it’ as a writer or not. What matters is that writing is a part of who I am – it’s what makes me tick. And until my dying day I will keep doing it – whether there’s gold at the end of the rainbow or not.

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3 thoughts on “To write or not to write (not really a question)

  1. Just stopping by, to say hi, and good luck in the quest! NaNoWriMo is hard. I failed my first one, dropped out of the second one, only to turn that idea into over a hundred thousand words (Still editing, so I won’t call it a novel… might jinx it!). Keep writing, and you’ll get there!

    • Hi TJ, sorry for the late response, and thanks for your comment. It is hard isn’t it? But worth it for those occasional glorious moments when everything feels like it’s on track and the plot and characters shine. I’m still hanging in there, good luck with your editing!

      • No worries about the late response! This year I’m busy playing NaNoWriMo support angel! I am your own personal cheerleader! (Along with hundreds of other writers!)

        I went back and realised in my story while editing I had some sort of subconscious moment of brilliance when I foreshadowed something hundreds of pages in between… oh it was like finding Excalibur while taking out the rubbish! Not that my story is rubbish… but, well… you know what I mean!

        Good luck and feel free to stop by my blog! Right now I’m trying to help struggling NaNoWriMo writers get back on track by building support for them! It can be as easy as tossing them a like or follow! 😀 Feel free to pay it forward if you’d like! Thanks for the well wishes!

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